Thursday, April 26, 2007
Do not mind the vulgarity.
Please.
I am sick of everything.
I am sick of crap from human beings.
I cant wait for attachment to end.
I am not looking forward to working.
Unless i noe itz a nice ward.
Still, i'm not looking forward to working.
I hate myself.
I am seriously growing FATTER.
I stopped netball totally.
I stop doing any form of exercise totally.
I suck.
I hate myself.
Please save the Earth.
Our lives are at stake.
So goes for the rest of living beings.
Help.
Recycle.
Reduce.
Reuse.
Do i sound like im kidding?
Posted by Sui Teng at 10:34 PM
Sunday, April 22, 2007
Yesterday i met Saiful n gang for dinner.
I felt bad coz i joined them for dinner LATE and then i left EARLY.
I shouldnt have evened joined them for dinner.
Haiz.
Anyways i didnt quite feel i fit in.
So extra seh.
Macam mana nyer star karat je.
Haiz, so sorry Saiful, and thx for the treat~!
Tuesday coming!
Then i met my girlfriends!
Good to see them after quite sometime!
I love listening to people yak away!
If the topics are interesting of course. . hee. .
Haiz, sorry that the meeting was cut short. .
Anyways, gez the next time round we should have a unanimous decision about wat all of us can and will do together. .
Macam smlm satu nak ni yang lagi satu nak tu. hehe. .
I don't know why but yesterday,
i felt strongly:
1. that I should know more about directions (*yawn* said that a million times but nothing changed)
2. appreciative of the given freedom. ( not tied down by anything)
To J,
I feel that you should not be too kind to me.
Juz treat me like any normal friend plz.
Do for me what you would do for any other friend of yours.
The whole situation makes it look like as if im taking advantage of you.
I don't like that kind of feeling.
I'm pretty independent in certain stuff.
I feel bad and guilty knowing that you're doing so many things for me.
I appreciate it really, but none moved my heart.
Maybe sometimes the way i act or things i said gives u hope.
I shall not do that again.
Giving one false hopes is one of the greatest sins ever.
I don't wanna hurt anyone.
I don't wanna be hurt.
Let's just be friends, alright?
Normal ones.
I felt bad coz i joined them for dinner LATE and then i left EARLY.
I shouldnt have evened joined them for dinner.
Haiz.
Anyways i didnt quite feel i fit in.
So extra seh.
Macam mana nyer star karat je.
Haiz, so sorry Saiful, and thx for the treat~!
Tuesday coming!
Then i met my girlfriends!
Good to see them after quite sometime!
I love listening to people yak away!
If the topics are interesting of course. . hee. .
Haiz, sorry that the meeting was cut short. .
Anyways, gez the next time round we should have a unanimous decision about wat all of us can and will do together. .
Macam smlm satu nak ni yang lagi satu nak tu. hehe. .
I don't know why but yesterday,
i felt strongly:
1. that I should know more about directions (*yawn* said that a million times but nothing changed)
2. appreciative of the given freedom. ( not tied down by anything)
To J,
I feel that you should not be too kind to me.
Juz treat me like any normal friend plz.
Do for me what you would do for any other friend of yours.
The whole situation makes it look like as if im taking advantage of you.
I don't like that kind of feeling.
I'm pretty independent in certain stuff.
I feel bad and guilty knowing that you're doing so many things for me.
I appreciate it really, but none moved my heart.
Maybe sometimes the way i act or things i said gives u hope.
I shall not do that again.
Giving one false hopes is one of the greatest sins ever.
I don't wanna hurt anyone.
I don't wanna be hurt.
Let's just be friends, alright?
Normal ones.
Posted by Sui Teng at 12:07 PM
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Sun ,15th AprilI discovered green tea ice blended (bubble tea) at parkway parade!!!
And it rawkz!!!
Love it !!!!
Same day that i was upset and mad at someone.
Monday, 16th April,
I didnt quite contact the person.
Tuesday, 17th April,
I started to sniff here and there.
Impending flu.
Weds, 18th April,
IT came !!
I didnt go for attachment.
My head was kinda heavy, my nose was runny and blocked at times, my throat was burning.
MC saves the day?
He came to my place with strepsils, cough mixture n donuts.
Thanks a lot.
You didnt have to, u knew.
Thurs, 19th April
Today is a pretty sad day.
I saw my friend in a miserable situation.
I cant say i understand how he feels becos itz 6 years of everything ending there and then.
Sigh.
His words were filled with deep sorrow.
When i hear his story, i had a few thoughts bubbling,
WHY ARE WOMEN SO EVIL
however,
SOME THINGS CANT BE HELPED
Haiz, we are so cruel.
When i look at him, i went like,
THANK GOD IM NOT IN A RSHIP
but then, come to think of it,
IM MISSING OUT ON THE GOOD STUFF
am i ?
hmmm, thats very subjective.
In every aspect of life, there wil be pros and cons.
The will be ups and downs.
We cant be happy all day long.
We cant be smiling all day long.
The best part is overcoming whatever that hits us.
Thats the hardest hurdle and the biggest joy.
Posted by Sui Teng at 10:43 PM
Friday, April 13, 2007
* * * * * * *
These are the contents of my heart.
I have no intentions of disrupting anyone's life.
Neither do i have the urge to be cruel.
However, i just want to clear up some issues.
To love or to be loved, they say.
I choose, neither.
I have experienced the latter.
Hoping to experience the former.
Unfortunately, it didnt happen.
I wonder why.
Foolishness got the best of me.
I guess i don't really know what i have in hand.
The good things in my life.
Others see it clearly.
They would love to have what i have.
In the end, i lost some to others.
They're enjoying it now.
It hasnt got to me yet.
Till now.
To love
I havent been in such a situation. (not incl family)
Never did i utter an 'i love u' whenever in a relationship.
Coz i never felt that strongly.
It is a word to be used meaningfully.
An overuse would result in a wear off of itz novelty.
It should be said less often, compensated by actions.
To be loved
Can i say i experienced it before.
Now, I find it hard to believe no matter how sincere it gets.
Of course it makes me feel good.
I tend to give a biased response.
Itz unfair, i know.
But sometimes things cant be helped.
Actions without reasons.
For now,
I am emotionless.
My heart is unfriendly, not in use and simply out of bounds.
Sometimes i yearn to be with a companion,
but when the chance arises,
i simply push it away bcoz i feel like i dun deserve to be in one.
Or i'm not really in the mood to be in one.
Perhaps, i prefer waiting.
Waiting for someone who is really serious, sincere and patient about the pursuit of my love.
All that sums up to one word : Choosy?
I don't really know.
Time and tide waits for no man.
Maybe i'm destined to be alone.
Hopefully not.
I'm still struggling with other issues in life.
Life is a challenge i'm willing to take on.
I'm going thru it, with enthusiasm.
One of the issues,
Still in the pursuit of finding myself.
The real me.
I have no intentions of disrupting anyone's life.
Neither do i have the urge to be cruel.
However, i just want to clear up some issues.
To love or to be loved, they say.
I choose, neither.
I have experienced the latter.
Hoping to experience the former.
Unfortunately, it didnt happen.
I wonder why.
Foolishness got the best of me.
I guess i don't really know what i have in hand.
The good things in my life.
Others see it clearly.
They would love to have what i have.
In the end, i lost some to others.
They're enjoying it now.
It hasnt got to me yet.
Till now.
To love
I havent been in such a situation. (not incl family)
Never did i utter an 'i love u' whenever in a relationship.
Coz i never felt that strongly.
It is a word to be used meaningfully.
An overuse would result in a wear off of itz novelty.
It should be said less often, compensated by actions.
To be loved
Can i say i experienced it before.
Now, I find it hard to believe no matter how sincere it gets.
Of course it makes me feel good.
I tend to give a biased response.
Itz unfair, i know.
But sometimes things cant be helped.
Actions without reasons.
For now,
I am emotionless.
My heart is unfriendly, not in use and simply out of bounds.
Sometimes i yearn to be with a companion,
but when the chance arises,
i simply push it away bcoz i feel like i dun deserve to be in one.
Or i'm not really in the mood to be in one.
Perhaps, i prefer waiting.
Waiting for someone who is really serious, sincere and patient about the pursuit of my love.
All that sums up to one word : Choosy?
I don't really know.
Time and tide waits for no man.
Maybe i'm destined to be alone.
Hopefully not.
I'm still struggling with other issues in life.
Life is a challenge i'm willing to take on.
I'm going thru it, with enthusiasm.
One of the issues,
Still in the pursuit of finding myself.
The real me.
Posted by Sui Teng at 9:48 PM
Posted by Sui Teng at 5:17 PM
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Posted by Sui Teng at 2:12 PM
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
You might be anorexic if…1. You are a walking calorie counting book
2. You own more than one scale, because just one can’t be trusted
3. You check the cupboards 20 times to see if there is anything you can eat, and there never is
4. You’re down to 6…no wait 5 safe foods
5. You have forgotten that some women have to plan things around their periods because you haven’t had one in God knows how long
6. You think 20 calories is too many for a drink
7. You see your 7 year old niece and want her skinny legs, arms and flat chest
8. Sugar free gum, diet drinks, and water count as meals
9. Your “drug supplier” deals in ephedrine10. You think corn is too calorie dense
11. You’re the only one you know who shuns mochas and drinks it black
12. You are mortally afraid of pizza and pop tarts
13. Your self worth is based in how many back ribs you see today
14. A tenth of a pound makes a freaking difference!
15. Your pulse is below 50, and you’re not an athlete
16. Your thinsperation is the skeleton in the lab
17. Holocaust victims don’t make you cringe, you kind of like it
18. You’ve discovered some of the cardio machines at the gym don’t go below 100 pounds on the “enter your weight” part.
19. You’ve also found out the some gyms set their machines to go to “cool down” after only an hour.
20. It takes you so long to decide what to buy at the grocery store, because what your body wants and what your ED wants are horribly conflicted, you finally just give up and leave.
21. You are also mortally afraid of sugar and maybe even think that people are putting sugar instead of splenda in your coffee when they ask what you’d like in it.
22. The new diet Pepsi strawberry tastes so good you have to check ever sip to make sure it still says “0” calories.
23. You have canceled plans to a sold out rock show because that’s the only time you could get your exercises in.
24. It’s 75 and you’re at the beach, but you’re wearing long jeans, and a sweatshirt because a) your freezing and b) you think you’re too f-ing fat.
25. You have “fur”
26. You shop in the kids section
27. It hurts to sit on hard chairs
28. You’re never without sugar free gum
29. You laugh when people say they’re “starving” when you know they just had lunch 3 hours ago…
30. You sign up to fast for every “good/spiritual/political cause” on your campus because it’s a good cover and people think you’re such an activist.
Posted by Sui Teng at 4:56 PM
Monday, April 9, 2007
Her heart is still as cold as ice
Posted by Sui Teng at 1:03 PM
Friday, April 6, 2007
| Your Love Quote |
Love makes the wildest spirit tame, and the tamest spirit wild. |
Posted by Sui Teng at 4:54 PM
| You Are a Mermaid |
 You are a total daydreamer, and people tend to think you're flakier than you actually are. While your head is often in the clouds, you'll always come back to earth to help someone in need. Beyond being a caring person, you are also very intelligent and rational. You understand the connections of the universe better than almost anyone else. |
Posted by Sui Teng at 4:22 PM
| You Are a Powdered Devil's Food Donut |
 A total sweetheart on the outside, you love to fool people with your innocent image. On the inside you're a little darker, richer, and more complex. You're a hedonist who demands more than one pleasure at a time. Decadent and daring, you test the limits of human indulgence. |
Posted by Sui Teng at 3:18 PM
"Lil Star"
There is nothing special about me
I am just a lil star
If it seems like I'm shining brightly
It's probably a reflection of something you already are
I forget about myself sometimes
When there's so many other around
When deep inside you feel the darkness
That is where I can always be found
That is where I can always be found
That is where I can always be found
There is nothing special about me
I am just a lil star
If it seems like I'm shining brightly
It's probably a reflection of something you already are
I forget about myself sometimes
When there's so many other around
When deep inside you feel the darkness
That is where I can always be found
That is where I can always be found
That is where I can always be found
Just keep trying and trying
It's just a matter of timing
Though the grinding is tiring
Don't let 'em stop you from smiling
Just keep trying and trying
Sooner or later you'll find it
It's surprising how inspiring
It is to see you shining
Cause in the dark of the night you're all i can see
and you sure look like a star to me
It's just a matter of timing
Though the grinding is tiring
Don't let 'em stop you from smiling
Just keep trying and trying
Sooner or later you'll find it
It's surprising how inspiring
It is to see you shining
Cause in the dark of the night you're all i can see
and you sure look like a star to me
There is nothing special about me
I am just a lil star
If you try to reach out and touch me
you'll see I'm not really that far
I may not be the brightest nor am I the last one you'll see
But as long as you notice, that's just fine with me
Everything's just fine with me
Everything's just fine with me
I am just a lil star
If you try to reach out and touch me
you'll see I'm not really that far
I may not be the brightest nor am I the last one you'll see
But as long as you notice, that's just fine with me
Everything's just fine with me
Everything's just fine with me
Just keep trying and trying
It's just a matter of timing
Though the grinding is tiring
Don't let 'em stop you from smiling
Just keep trying and trying
Sooner or later you'll find it
It's surprising how inspiring
It is to see you shining
Cause in the dark of the night you're all i can see
and you sure look like a star to me
It's just a matter of timing
Though the grinding is tiring
Don't let 'em stop you from smiling
Just keep trying and trying
Sooner or later you'll find it
It's surprising how inspiring
It is to see you shining
Cause in the dark of the night you're all i can see
and you sure look like a star to me
There is nothing special about me
I am just a lil star
I've been running and jumping, but barely
Getting, getting over the bar
I plan on being much more than I, am but that's in do time
But until then I'm guilty, and being human is my crime
Being human that is my crime
Being human that is my crime
I am just a lil star
I've been running and jumping, but barely
Getting, getting over the bar
I plan on being much more than I, am but that's in do time
But until then I'm guilty, and being human is my crime
Being human that is my crime
Being human that is my crime
Just keep trying and trying
It's just a matter of timing
Though the grinding is tiring
Don't let 'em stop you from smiling
Just keep trying and trying
Sooner of later you'll find it
It's surprising how inspiring
It is to see you shining
Cause in the dark of the night you're all i can see
and you sure look like a star to me
It's just a matter of timing
Though the grinding is tiring
Don't let 'em stop you from smiling
Just keep trying and trying
Sooner of later you'll find it
It's surprising how inspiring
It is to see you shining
Cause in the dark of the night you're all i can see
and you sure look like a star to me
Posted by Sui Teng at 3:09 PM
Wednesday, April 4, 2007
Oh my god.I cant believe it.
I feel like smiling all the time in the ward.
Hahaha.
I'm crazy.
kerazeeee.
You know i've been whining about how badly i want a banker boyfriend.
Khehe, i'm crazzyy...
Anyway, i duno why but i tink i miss running.
i've been running in the ward today.
As in i literally never walk. haha.
not suppose to run in hospitals.
Posted by Sui Teng at 4:14 PM
Monday, April 2, 2007
PRCP
i was "late" for attachment today.
Reached at 6.55am.
So by the time i arrived, they have finished checking the controlled drugs and were in d midst of checking e trolley.
Then, after passing of the report, we did changing.
I was only at the first patient when the staff nurse came to me and said, 'wah today very hot ar, look, ur already sweating'.
I was like ???!?!?!?!??!?!?!???!?!?!?!
coz i wasnt perspiring, i had an oily face.
DAMMIT
then, my pimples are really multiplying.
Went to the pharmacy and yes, once again, i was bugged by the "do u want to try this facial product" shit.
I was like ARRGGGHHHH
ok, i'm cool. . . well at least trying to be. . .
When i was in the toilet with an auntie, i saw this and it reminded me of someone.. hahaha..
U noe who u r eh. .
The ward i'm in is kinda cool.
It has 5 working days for the staff.
The only ward wit it !!
But this ward has learning limitations.
Itz a rehab ward.
The nursing care is basically the same for most of the patients.
So like what the nurse said, ' u won't learn as much as ur frens in other wards'. .
hmm, is that suppose to be good or bad?
Today i went for fitting for the cgh uniform !!!
wah lau eh !
First, i got offended when the auntie labelled me as BIG.
Then when i went into the room, she handed me a uniform size LARGE, without qns.
So i juz accepted and tried it out. (aku tau aku bukan kecik, so L shud be acceptable for me)
When i got out of the fitting room,
the auntie say that itz big, i need an M.
Hmmpphhh..
So, i tried M and it fitted nicely.
Juz that itz short. Haha..
She gonna make it longer for me.
Oh well.
I always looked upon myself as big anyway.
I've big fat butts.
I have big jiggly thighs.
I have big fat legs.
Anyway, look, itz mak and pak.
